Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Introverted Romance In Our Troubled Minds-LYRICS

i've got affection to criticize, monogamy to abhor
a cold heart and an altered state of mind
and baby you're just what i'm looking for
because we'll go to sleep when we're dead
and i'll quit when i'm 25
but now i'm feeling indestructible
aimlessly alive

greedy minds think alike
great artists, narcissistic
it seems like you fucked up down this road before
but you know me, i'm pessimistic
the elusive or the primitive divine
i'll go wherever it goes
butterfly guts on the windshield
cigarette smoke out the window

i've got a mental image of the way you used to look at me
baby, lets push our limits
i've got a west coast heart and an east coast mentality
baby, lets push our limits
i've got a racing mind and enough gas to get to tennessee
baby, lets push our limits
i've got a west coast heart and an east coast mentality
baby, lets push our limits tonight

it happened a week ago tonight
fuzzy frankness, under the unsightly yellow lights
and the display of your seemingly submissive heart
it's always over before it fucking starts

and i'm not one to gush, i'm not prone to sensitivity
we just wedge 3,000 miles or that i've got my whole life ahead of me
and maybe you're just wary or maybe i am just naive
but we'd never agree

we yield to a feared and fateful clash
or heartache or overwrought whiplash
and these roles develop circumstantially
you'll be my fodder, i'll be your reverie

and i'm not one to gush i'm not prone to sensitivity
we just wedge 3,000 miles or that i've got my whole life ahead of me
and maybe you're just wary or maybe i am just naive
but we'd never agree
and maybe it's my fault, i can't cut the tie, i'm a masochist
60 hours, chased around and one elusive sidewalk kiss
and i'm not sure what i expected, but i couldn't bear to hear that this
is something you won't miss

we ride on the aftermath
as a subtle way of looking past, we neglect our instinct
and we live by the light of day
to alleviate my own dismay i detain the process

and everybody sounds their best
its the highbrow stream of consciousness
in a looming prime
depending on the absence or the distance all the time

love like intuitive alarm
a hail mary or a good luck charm dangled to clasp our interest
and our faith lies in the deprived unknown
you know that no one want to be alone, die young or impure

and everybody sounds their best
its the highbrow stream of consciousness
in a looming prime
depending on the absence or the distance
and its a sad decline
introverted romance in our troubled minds
a trying pine
depending on good fortune or coincidence all the time

the same hair color, the same tattoos
you've got unlimited resources or nothing to lose
you make a choice and you were always afraid of dying
and i know i've been distant and i've filled you with doubt
but i've been heartbroken and i figured out
we all make a choice and i've never been afraid of dying

but its fine because i'm already hardly alive
and keep on holding on, hostile or withdrawn
its our will, our way, live through it everyday
and i don't really care to stop it because we've
brought it all on ourselves for so long
and it helps us to remain valiant

harboring affection, you pull me in too deep
just for female attention or some form of relief
and we'll just come back, we're always ashamed of trying
its all so familiar, all of this pent-up regret
behind last night's mascara and 10 dollar bets
that you knew you'd lose, but you've never been ashamed of trying

the same apprehension, the same subtlety
its been 3 years and you still tread on me
its not a choice, its a struggle to stay conscious
some romantic metaphor, its an uncanny sign
baby, i'll be your muse if you'll always be mine
we spell it out in incoherent love songs

augustus, you keep fooling me
i have these wry epiphanies, like i could change
the excess or auxiliary
we fuck it up with envy and accost in vain
every word the same
the impending truth of our wellborn youth

the subsequent or the demise
to praise or to antagonize, it all sounds the same
the arrogant teenage prestige
seems like such a distinctive breed
disheveled fame taking steady aim
on cerebral wealth, or my own personal hell

and i put down the pen, a disjointed rebirth
of celebrities among the scum of the earth
and you look back confused you know that i will be there too

augustus, you keep fooling me
i have this sensibility i can't suppress
and we carry such a heavy burden
with every vulnerable word we can't express
and there's nothing to lose
when there's no room to move

and the frivolity is a temporary haven
like what we're drinking or what record's playing

you're pretty in the kind of way the compliance is dull
nerves in our subversive brains
you'd think that we don't believe anything
shoved at us as an artless fact
ideal or dressed to a T
and that's not to say that you aren't pretty
because you're beautiful to me

we don't grow well
when we huddle in groups and we cry all the time
and we obstruct the emphasis on routine days
and i don't really care about the future
i care about what keeps you away

and i choose to acknowledge anger when no one's ready to listen
like at these ostentatious parties
and i'm half-drunk in this crowded kitchen
and i yell 'you're a fucking hypocrite,
you wear your fear under your makeup'
being passive or being hostile
its good to smile to avoid the closeup

its a violent incentive, i just jerk you around
and you're always disappointed, we both feel tied down
its an eternal conundrum, why we do what we do
and we always discontinue what we don't misconstrue

the beat gets loud as the lights start fading
frustration seems so hard to blame
simple-minded, small-minded, what's the difference anyways?
like its my fault this all seems so set in stone
and its your fault that we're both drunk alone
active minds enduring every idle day
you wake up happy only if you want it that way

its autumn and 80 degrees
this good mood's right in front of me
like a couple of beers in good company
but your vacancy ignites me
you choose peril to just feel justified
its inconspicuous in your unashamed eyes
and in these pensive bathroom moments, you turn it up and think
'i could die tonight if he'd just talk to me'

if you found someone out on the road
you'd take it as a confident sign
and if i found someone down in florida
it wouldn't be the first time
its like when romance became so tangible
or when cynicism became so lovable
we depend upon these memories of content
and we'll lose this love without our own consent

the beat gets loud as the lights start fading
and all i see are brown eyes through petty faces

i said just go again
maybe i'm too ambiguous, the supreme subject of your distress
and its not so hard to aloof
brain on my sleeve, this abrupt mess that i get into

we go on all the time
maybe its hard today but its still better than the rest
when we're both so far away
i'm stuck with a depleted brain or a heart repressed
and i wish you were here with me
because i'd hide behind you shamelessly
atleast tonight

i said just stay a while
maybe you appear stoic or more stable than i could admit
florescent margins, we're born on edge
formally brain dead
we reside behind, forget ahead

you won't, you won't, you'll never say
what you're thinking about most everyday
and your function masks your sentiment
your laugh conceals your discontent

i won't know the score when the sedative stains
nothing enthralled me before
but glimpses of love or disdain

but i don't wanna live forever
i'm not looking for relief
i don't wanna live forever
you apprehension is what's bringing you peace

i drug you into this mess
and now i push you away
3 years if varnished distress
polarize delight or dismay
habitual contempt, to animalistic lust
i could hardly wash it down by the slow, dauntless dusk

i bet you thought you'd die before you'd see the day
when i'd adher to these trite, tender cliches
like you and me, we've been through everything
why we deny this pattern or what underlies
teenage southern comfort, penitent goodbyes
and my laments always sound like lullabies
its how our heart's contrived, to hang heavy
we get caught up all drenched in misanthropy
disagreeing just to disagree
and either i'm sadistic or they fall in love too easily

but its not redlight love
its not the grief that forces succumb
its not cold night love
its not the strain that forces us numb

i know that you'll believe me, that i meant no harm
your empathetic discourse is like an inner alarm
that you and me always end up back in each other's arms
it's our tender, tenacious hearts
they hang heavy

like a helpless captive, a distraught midwife
like a libran husband and a capricorn wife
i turn to wine and whiskey and these cryptic songs
maybe i'm passive aggressive or maybe i'm wrong

but don't go yet, old lipstick, old cassettes
clutter the carpet where my futile head rests
and i'd explain it, but i've long-since dismissed
the thought of vitality, you'll get nothing out of me
but don't go yet

and like a sore subject, objective pursuit
like a fearful me or an asinine you
and we avoid eye contact as i'm just dragged along
maybe i should just grow up or maybe i'm wrong

as soon as my eyes avert, more skin of alabaster
you don't warn me before, you just devastate me after
and like a dangling noose or like an endless sea
we both know how to love and i think you owe more to me

hollowed out between the places to go
there might be something there but you know i don't know
and i think we both find comfort
in the reckless exterior
because its 3 a.m. again and we're both still awake
our senses shut off for simplicity's sake
we both have a way with words but the silence sounds much better for tonight

i'm sorry for the mess, you see my mind is somewhere else
we revel in obscurity, surmount when we dwell

now you're making coffee in an unfamiliar house
indulge in frailty, looking for a way out
and temperance engulfs your mind everytime our aversion intertwines
it's early morning and we're both wide awake
kind of nostalgic but clearly a mistake
we connect through detachment
we prosper in a troubled medium


imagica said...

are the bike wreck lyrics around too?

Bitsy said...

love this. LOVE.